What was it, experiencing a love? A heartbreak? A new job? New friendship? First time motherhood? A church? A new you?
Trust me- I know how exciting and dangerous this entire experience can be. I like anyone else has gone through the motions of allowing myself to feel towards certain situations. More than anything I have experienced pain in return but others not so much.
The first time I let myself feel "love" for a man, I learned rather quickly that it wasn't love because it got abusive rather fast. The first time I let myself enjoy a new job I got fired within the next two weeks of getting comfortable.
New friendships, its terrifying to me- most move away, can't forgive me when I make mistakes, or get tired of me needing advice. New baby- they cry all the time, won't let me sleep, won't attach to me! New church- they judge me, see right through me, there's cliques, I could never be anything more than a failure.
New self, that is where you letting your guard down and feelings show is when the risk becomes beautiful!!
You walk into a church and experience genuine love and acceptance. The people give you a sense of purpose help you find your own self worth and you fun yourself there for the next three years hoping you will be there for the rest of your life.
That new life in Christ and the support around you gives you confidence to move forward and have a fresh start with each new child that you bring into the world. You allow yourself to feel patient, compassionate, and more honor for being a mother.
Friendships become more of a desire and come naturally in your life. They allow you to feel less alone, well liked, and allow you to feel the best parts of life that it has to offer.
You start a new job, it tries to tear you down. You can feel the negative but you choose to feel the positive. The job may not work out but you know it's okay because it didn't make you it's victim.
and heartbreak? Well that too becomes different. When you let yourself feel and truly feel yes the pain of losing someone you liked or loved will sting, but the feelings for that person outweigh that heartbreak giving a person hope for the future making it less than an end of the world situation.
And allowing yourself to feel attraction, emotions, and perhaps love towards another person is amazingly different. It's patient, kind, has speed bumps, is forgiven, grace and merciful, and is worth the wait......
Embracing feelings is absolutely beautiful but can turn a world into an ugly one. Feelings manifest into attitude which is expressed through the world and people around you. In order to have the courage to embrace ones feelings one must acknowledge and accept all outcomes involved possibly.
To know what could happen and do it anyways... Well there is nothing more beautiful then that.
Nobody wants to feel something bad which leads to many dangerous roads. But when we as people do feel, we have the hope in the vision that we see to be possibly magnificent and wonderful. We see the potential in whatever it is to shape our lives for the better and allow us to become the impacting individuals we dream to become.
Feelings are risky business and they could lead to heartache but you never know if you don't try!
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